With those two words I found the second most meaningful moments in my life.
The first is that day I came to a saving knowledge of Jesus Christ. But this day, my “quitting” day was like getting my second wind in my walk with the Savior. We should all be quitters, but quitters in a good way. Seems almost counter intuitive. If you study scripture, you will find that those who had the most impact were quitters. They were quitters in this sense; the quit relying on themselves, others, clergy or family to fulfill a need within them that only God could satisfy. They quit listening to the negative people, and invested in those who were on fire for Christ. The quit worrying. They quit worrying about solving, fixing, mending all relationships outside of their immediate and rear sphere of influence. I too, am a quitter. I quit carrying the burden for people who have no desire to carry it themselves. I quit filling my mind with scenarios about how my words, actions or inactions were going to offend someone’s precious sensibilities. I quit. I quit worrying about negative people. You see how that works? Let’s take this further, shall we?
In 1997 I began to attend a Bible study. You see, a few friends had encouraged me to read the Bible. So I started to read a red letter KJV. I still have it here on my shelf. Because I don’t speak the old English, I have since moved to ESV. I considered myself an intellectual, as Bill Cosby stated “we read to learn about things…” So being an intellectual, student of history and all around Renaissance man, I decided reading this book that I have never witnessed the interior of before would add to my cadre of smartypantsness. Reading the Bible would help me understand people. It would give me special insight into the religion of the world, a special view into the mind of history. Little did I know what happens when the human mind comes in contact with the Word of God. It changes you. It transforms you. It burdens you. Having never set foot in religious services, outside of a few weddings, my friends figured I was hopeless. I was tremendously gifted in my reading, memory and understanding of the Bible. Or so I thought. My intellectual assent to the subject matter was one day transformed into a life changing moment.
Nearly a year after I first began to read the Book, I was watching Dr. Charles Stanley from In Touch ministries. Now I had a fond appreciate of his style, his straightforwardness and his ability to communicate. Little did I know that the Holy Spirit had prepared his message that day to pull my heart to salvation? Right at the end of the message, Dr. Stanley gave his ever so eloquent invitation. I accepted. I got up from the couch, went into the bathroom and knelt on the cold tile. There were no angels singing in my head, although I know they celebrated in Glory. There were no lightning flashes or liver shivers. That day I simply gave my life to Christ. A life that was riddled with over sexualization, over indulgence with booze, and a generally bad direction. Through God’s providence my young wife gave herself to Christ a month later. We were baptized together in January of 1998. She was 7 months pregnant with our first son, Noah. After Noah was born we brought him to Church. Pastor Eli Mercer was the pastor of First Baptist Church in Concord NH at the time. As we sat near the back, the tall figured pastor came to greet us. As we exchanged our typically Sunday morning pleasantries, he began talking about the baby. His words still wring in my ear – “You know what Noah means? Peace.” He had no idea how much peace we had recently discovered through Jesus Christ.
So, right now I quit. I quit attempting to be a pleaser of men. I desire to please God. If men are pleased with how I please God, then icing on the cake. If not, I would rather offend man than God.
Galatians 1:10 “Am I now trying to win the approval of men, or of God? Or am I trying to please men? If I were still trying to please men, I would not be a servant of Christ.”
